Random Rants of Reformed Chocoholic

In memory of the man, who thought me how to love.

2010-03-14T15:40:00.003-05:00

This is the short story written in under ten minutes, while trying to make a deadline for Road Guardians newsletter publishing. It made it on time and wasn't actually rejected :)

I was about four years old when my grandfather found a new punishment for my misbehavior at Church on Sundays. What four year old can stand for over an hour in a crowded place without letting a peep, follow directions and not complain?
Certainly not me. I was interested in everything around me.There is some old lady’s purse that was just sitting there, opened and exposing all her belongings.

I wondered if she had candy? The little girls huge ribbons neatly braided into her hair. I often thought how would they look in my hair. If I had hair to braid that is. My recent adventure with scissors didn’t end very well, and my parents were still trying to find some punishment for me that would teach me a lesson. According to my parents, I was uncontrollable brat, and when my grandfather finally stepped up, and decided that he was going to “discipline” me I wasn’t sure what he really meant. I guess he realized that I needed more stimulation than an average toddler, and he made me do awful things. First, he started with teaching me how to read. I guess that explains sudden increase of grey hair on his head. Hours of torture were eased over the winter months, because there wasn’t really anything else to do, and I picked up reading rather quickly after the rough start. Writing wasn’t quite as pleasurable. Being born a “lefty”, back in the day was not a cool thing. Of course I quickly shaped up and made my right hand do things it didn’t want to, and sloppy letters were introduced to the eyes of my parents. They didn’t like it. Back to more practice for me. I complied just so I wouldn’t have to show slap stick marks on my hands later. Spring arrived, and suddenly my grandfather become a genius. He found a new punishment for me that did not involve pen and paper or boring books. In his old, slightly leaning to the side shed, what he called a garage, was his beast. The Beast had not been seen by anyone, as he was working on it for many months. Honestly, I always thought it was some kind of a big dog, or other farm animal, and was afraid to ask questions. All black and shiny with lots of chrome, The Beast was sitting there, staring at me. That chrome was what I was suppose to polish every Sunday from now on. Little that my grandfather knew, I actually loved making swirlies on that shiny surface and looking at my own reflection in the huge headlight. The Beast wasn’t as scary as I first imagined. This punishment I can live with. My grandfather realized that he had sparked unusual interest in this bratty four year old, and with a smile on his face, he offered me a first ride! My very first ride! I was ecstatic, even though I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. This thing actually works? With funky goggles covering most of my freckled face, and grandmothers huge shawl wrapped around my head and arms just in case I wouldn’t get cold it had to be the “Kodak moment” of the sixties. With a little cough and loud rattle we rolled out of the neighborhood into the streets. Holding on to his jacket, I was frozen in place, and afraid to open my eyes.“ How did you like it?” he asked once we were back home, and all I could remember was the feeling of the cool wind on my face, the smell of the country, flowers and fields. And occasional car fumes. My ears were still holding the sounds of nature. The noise of the car engines have never sounded this way before. “I like it, grandpa.” I remember saying, and running into my room. Every day of my life I have spent dreaming of having my own beast some day. Later in school I would sit and watch older guys start their mopeds, and was wondering if I ever have one of my own. Mopeds were the next exciting thing next to what I really wanted. Since the big beast was less realistic at the time, I kept on dreaming.I was very grateful when a kid in my class offered me to try his motorized bicycle. It will never be the same, but it has engine, and makes noise. That’s all that mattered to me. The sounds of the running motor were like a therapy to my soul. My dream didn’t come true until I was in my late twenties. My very first motorcycle wasn’t black with chrome, but rather red, and girly. Perfect fit for me, even though some said it was too powerful for a newbie, and that I was going to kill myself on it. I let them believe they’re right, but I know, that everyone has their own destiny.Today, my grandfather rides with me everywhere I go. It is him, who started me on this love for chrome, and not one day goes by when I don’t thank him for all that he has though me over the short time we were together. My new black machine is shiny, chrome well-polished, only I don’t call him The Beast. His name is Ed.

It's been a while. A long while.

2010-02-02T12:36:00.003-06:00

I have given up writing for a while. My life events and things that stood in my way have been somewhat reorganized, and I am starting to miss the daily blabber.

I had a New Year resolution, and now, the New Year isn't so new anymore. It is actually going faster than I expected, and days aren't long enough for me to finish what I started.

Perhaps I should give up my job, and start enjoying life? Not a bad idea, but it arises a tiny little problem. Bills!
Someone needs to pay them.

Needless to say, and regardless of workload and financial distress, I am still determined to do some more travelling than I did in the past years. Some places on two wheels, and some by a car, but I will travel, even if it is only a long weekend trip.

So far I have Florida, Arizona, South Dakota, New York, and possibly Texas on my list of places to visit. Let's see how am I going to cram all this in my schedule.

Better in person?

2009-06-17T07:17:00.003-05:00

My friend asked me last weekend why do I like going to book signings and why do I bother wasting time on my trips to meet the authors?

I was a little startled, because I thought that the answer wasn't needed, and that it was pretty self explanatory, but I guess not in this case.

I love reading books, especially when there is a mystery and humor involved and I think people who write them are pretty darn special. After all, writing a book, and getting it published is not all that easy. Unless, of course you self publish.

Seeing authors of my favorite books is exciting for me for many reasons. Not only I get to meet them in person, see that they are actually real people, but I get the feel of their own character. Often the personalities shine right throughout the pages I read, and once I know their real face, their gesture and hear their voice it allows me to enjoy and understand the book a lot better. It makes a difference knowing that I am reading a book of someone I actually met in person, especially when it is one of my local writers whom I have or already had a chance of bumping into on other, unrelated to book selling occasion.

Does that sound too weird to you? I guess there was a time I would think that, too. But since I actually experienced living almost next door to one of my admired authors, and having a couple more in the area where I live, it all changed how I see it.

It is a great experience, and I will keep doing this whenever I get a chance.

Below, my latest weekend trip while babysitting my step-grandson to neighboring town to see Morgan Mandel - a very sweet lady who keeps me occupied with her blogs and books.

Do you feel old?

2009-06-16T10:54:00.003-05:00

I have been trying not to think about age, especially lately. I have friends younger then myself and if I was to judge by looks, I'd say, some look older than their age. On the other hand, a couple of the older friends that I have seem to look younger. To me it's not about the looks but the behavior and how they feel inside.

There are days I feel old. Maybe it is because my oldest daughter just turned 21, or maybe because I have a few younger friends that do not have any children, which gives them more time to play and enjoy life. Perhaps it's the few aches and pains I have developed, that are giving me trouble. I don't know why, but I do not like those days.

In general, I feel just fine, and try not to think about the days slipping away too quickly from me.

Trying to keep positive thoughts, and spend as much time as much as I can doing things I enjoy.

What abut you? Do you ever have moments when you feel old?

What's your solution?

That's it. I've had it!

2009-06-04T10:49:00.002-05:00

Is it just me, or did everyone else also noticed, that the weather lately is only nice during work days? On weekends we are searching for umbrellas and jackets and hoping for a ray of sun.

Each time I plan to get away and relax, enjoy the nice, sunny day, I get the most unexpected forecast.

We made plans to ride to Door County, because the weather was promising at the time, and we only have every other weekend to do something for us adults. Sure enough, the five hour ride needs to be reconstructed and plans slightly adjusted. We will be driving instead, which is still nice, but not as exciting as being on two wheels.

I have never been to Door County so regardless of how I get there, I am still excited.

I will bring lots of pictures!

On a sad note, I am pretty upset about the Air France. The mourning families and what the passengers on board experienced during the diseaster is difficult to imagine.

I refuse to read about wether there were any small children on board. I get very sad and upset at any time I read something happened to little innocent angels. I think it has something to do with my past life. I was hoping they would still find some survivors, although this was a slim chance come to think of it.

Irresponsible men make me cringe. Not just all men, but one in particular.

I will not elaborate on this at this very moment, but I am very angry with certain someone for making false promises time after time to a small girl, who already at such young age can determine for herself that she is being lied to. I simply don't like seeing sad faces and tears on her face.

Once again I will glance over the weather prediction for the weekend. I am just afraid of what I am going to see. Seems like it's changing every few hours. Do they even really know what the weather is going to be like anyways?

Too little fiber or too much Botox?

2009-05-20T07:14:00.001-05:00

I was watching TV one night, and as I was flipping channels I saw something that got ma rolling on the floor. I didn't care what the topic of the conversation was at that moment, and from what I could tell, it was politics, but the facial expression of that guy on there was constantly like the one you see there. I wonder...to much BOTOX? Or something a little fiber would fix? ( pictures curtesy of my cell ohone)

Counting days...

2009-05-19T13:38:00.000-05:00

Finally, the weather got a little nicer, where I don't have to wake up to dark, gloomy morning.

Yesterday, after my doctors appointment I just didn't feel like going back to work, so I decided to take a bike ride to the city and visit my friend and his dogs.

I haven't seen them yet since he got them last year. As a matter of fact I haven't seen dogs like this, and was stunned when a 130lb beast charged at me, and started licking me with his enormous tongue and leaving slobber all over me.

His Greater Swiss Mountain Dogs, both male and female were the most lovable dogs I have seen lately. Makes me miss mine :(

Seeing those beasts really made me miss my dogs, but one thing I don't miss for sure is the mountains of poop to clean and all the hair that sticks to everything.

Four more days till I meet with Sandy and Brie in San Francisco! I can't wait. We are leaving for Cali Thursday morning and will spend about an hour in Dallas, strolling the airport and hopefully staying out of trouble.

Ironically, this is the weekend that the weather here in IL should be at lower 80's, which means awesome!

Messenger chat- meaningless conversation with a stranger

2009-05-16T20:31:00.005-05:00

The whole week just flew by so fast, I can't believe it's already another weekend.

I have been busy at work and my own projects, and haven't really felt like blogging or even attempting to finish my writing.

From time to time I still get some weirdos sending me messages, and I ignore them for the most part. My "ignore" list on messenger is already exhausted and tech support told me to delete some of the 500 ignored names in order to add new ones. Ha! Thats not as easy. Why? Because I get those messages on daily basis.

This one has been my entertainment on my morning coffee break:

Show Recent Messages (F3)

samimahboub is currently not in your Messenger List.

Add to your Messenger List (Ctrl+Shift+A) Report as Spam (Alt+Shift+R)

samimahboub: i want to contact you ' are youready

Aggie: no, Im not

samimahboub: whay

Aggie: im not ready

samimahboub: when you will be able to chat

Aggie: never

Aggie: my doctor says I cant use the computer

samimahboub: cam on ,d'ont warry..

samimahboub: your doctor is sick

Aggie: i know, they feed me those pink and yellow pilld all the time

samimahboub: i'm the real doctor

Aggie: sure

samimahboub: yea you will see

Aggie: ok, soon as they let me out of this mental institution

samimahboub: i want a serious relation with you.

Aggie: I am serious

samimahboub: can you sent me yuor pictur

samimahboub: me too

Aggie: nope

samimahboub: what up

Aggie: told you

samimahboub: are beatiful like me

Aggie: ok

samimahboub: how old are you

Aggie: 14

samimahboub: ok that's fine i hav16

Aggie: 16 what

samimahboub: because you don't say the truth

samimahboub: really i have 25years

samimahboub: and you

Aggie: 25 years of what?

Aggie: I have 14 like I said,

samimahboub: oh my god you are so kids

samimahboub: but no problem you can understand me

Aggie: thats the thing, I dont understand

samimahboub: what's your origin

Aggie: I ooooriginated from egg

samimahboub: from eggpakistan

Aggie: you are?

samimahboub: or eggafganistan

samimahboub: i'm from effffffffffffffffff

samimahboub: are you sexy girl

Aggie: no

samimahboub: are you a human

samimahboub: i think you are an extra terest; lik starwar

Aggie: Im not a human

samimahboub: so can i kiss you

Aggie: go ahead

samimahboub: are you ............

samimahboub: sorry , but i enjoy with you

Aggie: ok, Im glad i dont see what is it that you enjoy.

samimahboub: look i 'm not exelent in inglish so please choose your ward easy

samimahboub: can you speak frensh

Aggie: only chinese

Aggie: ,jfhhfghvoeigjfgb

samimahboub: tha's beter than english;rrffdeopzaa!:qwx^zaçs<^

Aggie: ok

samimahboub: you are not serious

samimahboub: you_are not serious.

Aggie: IM very serious

samimahboub: so what you dont want to say your name or your nationaliti,

Aggie: NOTHING

Nap time!

2009-05-16T18:34:00.000-05:00

Ok, so trying to entertain he little guy ( see previous post) I got him to watch Tom and Jerry. He loved it. Only thing is when it ended, he started to get fussy. Ruby and Max, ( most anoying voice over ever) got him to fall asleep so now I can attend to my breakfast, cleaning and whatever else I can cram in this estimated hour of his nap!

Did I sing up for this?

2009-05-16T18:31:00.002-05:00

Being a grandma might be joyful when you are older, and really, really and I mean really have grown up kids, and havent been exposed to thump sucking, diaper soiling and crying for no reason in quite a while. In my case I still have the five year old at home and didn't get a chance to relax and enjoy 'me" time like I wanted to.

Getting up at 5:30 am on a weekend to watch a one year old isn't my thing, but don't take me wrong, I enjoy the little guy. He isn't really my grandson, because my daughters know better than making me a grandma at such young age.

He belongs to my BF daughter, and since his real grandma is no involved in his life, I am the step-grandma and anjeoying it.

Every other weekend, we are helping the young parents while they are working, and babysitting that little rascal. He is a joy to be around, always smiling and happy no matter what. Facing some challenges when born 3 months premature, he is now making up for all the lost time, eating a lot and growing healthy.

I don't mind watching him at all, and this is not a complaint, but being up at 6 am is something I have to get used to. Seriously.

Good thing it is only on occasion and he gets to go home with his parents in a few ours. I am definitely not a morning person or a fan of soiled diapers. Speaking of which, I have to go change another one of the stiky ones...oh crap! No, really!

The hair dilemma

2009-05-15T10:35:00.015-05:00

My online friend, Gayle_Carline has posted a blog about hair. This subject has inspired me to write something about my hair as well.

Actually it isn't as much about my hair, but rather experience, common sense and preference of having long versus short hair, and the reason behind it.

In my twenties and thirties I maintained long hair.

I colored it often and had different styles, but the hair was always long. About a year ago I decided that I was just tired of spending time in the bathroom getting my hair done, and started to shorten my hair gradually.

From almost waist line to shoulder lenght to short shag, the transition wasn't as painful as I though it would be. I actually liked it. The short, maintenance free hair didn't last long. It was either to keep it short by constant trimming or grow it out. I decided to go back to longer hair. Let me tell you, that going through stage of when your hair doesn't want to be in the place you want it to be is not easy.

No amounts of gel or other products would help. I think I still have good six months left before I can do something with my hair. I know I will never let it grow as long as it was before, but as long as I can put it up for the summer, I'm happy. Now, if I just could make the greys to stop popping out...

A friend of mine, who is older by a few years, and more stubborn refuses to take advice of improving her looks. Being her age, women have more of a sophisticated look, where she thinks she is still in her twenties. Her hair is very long, dry and out dated. Constant dyeing and straightening makes her hair look very dry.

Being the lenght that it is, she is a walking fire hazard, and she is not allowed in my kitchen when the stove is on. i always visualize her hair going up in flames, especially that it's hanging at the stove level and is very, very frizzy and dry.

Our friends and I decided to sign her up for a total makeover, but we all know it will not last long.

So how do we convince her to do something different to her hair? Leave it naturally curly at least, or get a hair cut?

Me ( left) with janet Evanovich in 2006 and my longer hair.

Drenched

2009-04-28T13:20:00.003-05:00

Ditching rain all morning was nice. I started feeling almost as if it was some sort of a game. Will it rain? Nah. The clouds will go to the south or north of us, so we will get lucky. Again. Just like we did in the last two days.

This time we weren’t so lucky. As we saddled in on the bikes and sped away, within minutes we were soaking wet. The cold, heavy rain was merciless and we had no choice but find shelter under the roof of a first gas station we saw.

We watched the wall of rain fall from the sky fast. The cars slowed down to nearly turtle speed as the water created hard to see through mist.

The whole three and a half minutes later it was all over. The sky brightened up, and fast moving clouds in various shades of grey were passing over our heads like layers of curtains exposing sun rays that instantly warmed up everything.

Back on the bike again, but instead of turning back, and going home, we chanced it again taking a trip to another town in pursuit of our original plan.

Arriving five minutes too late to be serviced by not so nice people who hate working on weekends, we were pretty disappointed, but gathered necessary documents to fill out later, and took off. Back towards home stopping only for what was our breakfast for lunch deal.

No rain on the horizon. So what to do? The radar is showing clear of rain for the next three hours at least. Why go home now? It’s going to be nice and dry and with some sun out, perfect to ride.

Off we go again,. Destination: Friends house 10 miles away.

We arrived safely and dry and as soon as we entered the from porch of a house, the first drops of another yet rain cloud showed it’s presence.

Hoping for just a short drizzle, we hung around the garage and front porch as some kind of house stalkers for at least an hour.

Look! The clouds are going away. Perhaps now we should chance it.

Soon as we managed to gear up again, the rain was coming down even more.

Great! Turn back or keep on going? Haven’t we spent half a day already just waiting for this to stop? Doesn’t look like it will. Let’s go.

So off in to the roads covered with wet mist. At least the drops were not hail size as before, and it wasn’t as cold as few hours ago.

Next six miles seemed like eternity. Finally we pulled up in the driveway all relieved and ready for a hot shower. The sun was out now and no sign of rain. Of course, why would it be raining now? We are home and not planning on going out again today.

Why sentence structure is so important:

2009-04-16T09:50:00.002-05:00

The boss had to fire somebody, and he narrowed it down to one of two people: Mary or Jack. It was an impossible decision because they were both decent workers.

Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning.
Mary came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night.

She went to the cooler to take an aspirin. The boss approached her and said,

"Mary, I've never done this before, but I either have to lay you or Jack off."

"Could you jack off?" she said. "I feel like shit this morning."

The day after Easter - in my culture

2009-04-13T08:50:00.001-05:00

Dyngus Day or Wet Monday (Polish Śmigus-dyngus or Lany Poniedziałek) is the name for Easter Monday in Poland. In the Czech Republic it is calledVelikonoční pondělíor Pomlázka. InSlovakia Veľkonočný pondelok (Easter Monday) is calledŠibačka/Polievačka or Oblievačka too. All countries practice a unique custom on this day.

In Poland, Slovakia and the Czech Republic^[3] traditionally, early in the morning boys awake girls by pouring a bucket of water on their head and striking them about the legs with long thin twigs or switches made from willow, birch or decorated tree branches (palmy wielkanocne); however, the earliest documented^{[citation needed]} records of Dyngus Day in Poland are from the 15th century, almost half a millennium after Poland adopted Christianity.

Benedykt Chmielowski in Nowe Ateny cite after "Carolo Berthold" that this ritual was already in custom in 750, 250 years before Poland officially adopted Christianity.

One theory is that Dyngus originates from the baptism on Easter Monday of Mieszko I (Duke of the Polans, c. 935 - 992) in 966 AD, uniting all of Poland under the banner of Christianity. Dualism and "twins" are featured in Slavic pre-Christian paganism. Dyngus and Śmigus were twin pagan gods; the former representing water and the 'moist' earth (Dyngus from din gus - thin soup or dingen - nature) and the later, representing thunder and lightning (Smigus from Śmigać or to making a whooshing sound). In this theory, the water tradition is the transformation of the pagan water god into the Christian baptism. The custom of pouring water was an ancient spring rite of cleansing, purification, and fertility. It is alleged that the pagan Poles bickered with Nature/Dyngus by means of pouring water and switching with willows to make themselves pure and worthy of the coming year. Others have suggested that the striking tradition is the transformation of the ritual "slap" of Christian confirmation. However, still others suggest that the Smigus tradition is actually simply a youthful recapitulation of a Good Friday Polish tradition, in which parents wake their children with switches from twigs, whispering the words of a Lent prayer "the wounds of God" or "God is wounded" -'bozerani.

Early in the Colombian evolution of the tradition, the Dyngus custom was clearly differentiated from Śmigus: Dyngus was the exchange of gifts (usually eggs, often decorated like pisankas), under the threat of water splashing if one party did not have any eggs ready, while Śmigus referred to the striking.

Later the focus shifted to the courting aspect of the ritual, and young unmarried girls were the only acceptable targets. A boy would sneak into the bedroom of the girl he fancied and awaken her by drenching her with multiple buckets of water. Politics played an important role in proceedings, and often the boy would get access to the house only by arrangement with the girl's mother.

Throughout the day, girls would find themselves the victims of drenchings and leg-whippings, and a daughter who was not targeted for such activities was generally considered to be beznadziejna (hopeless) in this very coupling-oriented environment.

Most recently, the tradition has changed to become fully water-focused, and the Śmigus part is almost forgotten. It is quite common for girls to attack boys just as fiercely as the boys traditionally attacked the girls. With much of Poland's population residing in tall apartment buildings, high balconies are favorite hiding places for young people who gleefully empty full buckets of water onto randomly selected passers-by.

Another related custom, unique to Poland is that of sprinkling bowls (garce) of ashes on people (starts men on women) or houses, celebrated a few weeks earlier at the "półpoście." This custom is almost forgotten, but still practiced on the area around borders of Mazuria and Masovia.

Daily Rants and my biggest peeve of the day

2009-03-31T11:34:00.004-05:00

I hate moving, but I survived. First the office, and then the house. I'm actually much happier with both locations and the outcome.

I'm admiring new scenery on my way to work every day, and here is where my blood pressure rises and and I'm looking under my seat for something to throw out of my car window.

The longer part of the road is one lane, fast traffic, no stops or traffic lights mile and a half stretch, that most drivers do the 50 mph allowed speed limit. My luck, I always get some driver doing merely 30 mph in that zone, where you can actually floor it, and make up for the lost time driving through the city. Not only they don't care about other drivers piling up on their tails, the minute you try to pass them , they pick up speed only enough to make you go back in your lane again and follow. Slowly. Impatiently. Irritating the heck out of you.

On more than one occasion, you get lucky and you manage to pass them, and the view of disoriented driver on the cell phone just makes you want to puke. What's with those people?

If you want to chit-chat, pull over, go home, but don't be stalling everyone in your path!

The spring was officially announced, and yet, our crazy weather is playing tricks on us again. From seventy something temperatures, and people abandoning their winter coats and walking around in shorts to a foot of snow, two or more in other areas in less than a day. What's next?

Okay, I know we live in a crazy climate, and whats scary is, that it's only going to get more bizarre.

I like my new house, and location, but I absolutely despite the little birds crapping on my car every day. Since the garage is still filled up with some of the boxes, I park outside.

On each side of the driveway tree branches hanging over create bird heaven.

I wonder if they are having a great time throwing berries and shooting poop on the drivers side of the car? I can already picture them sitting and laughing silly, as I walk out each morning, get in and try to look out my window. Not a pretty view having a glob of bird poop right in my face.

Next in my plan will be calling the landscapers and having them trim the branches so they do not hang over the driveway. Maybe that will help.

Popping the lid.

2009-02-21T13:26:00.006-06:00

Men! Definitely can live without them.

Even the simple idea of living with “a man” sends chills down my spine, and the eye rolling begins. (Yes. I know not ALL men are alike, but this is about those few out there.)

I am lucky. I don’t share my house with any of those species, however; three newly hired guys are sharing the office.

More eye rolling. I know what you are thinking.

All of them and one of me, right? Well, this is only a slight addition to my frustration and man-hating in progress.

This makes one of ME, and five of THEM. The “other” species as I call them.

It would not bother me as much if they were at least semi domesticated.

After spending just three weeks in their presence, I am back to my old self: Normal. Whatever that means. Im having serious thoughts of not being so nice any more. I'm starting to hate men.

Okay, so I really do not hate them, but more like dislike their behavior.

Three weeks and I've had it!

The lights are never turned off after they leave the office.

Perhaps they should be paying the bills next time?

Coffee mugs are everywhere, and they think I am here to clean them. Big mistake! I don't do dishes here. And the ones they leave "accidentally" in bathroom sink are not going to be washed either.

Since they never really are here all together, and at the same time, but come and go, and on different schedules, they never know each other’s names, so someone calling with an accent, and asking for one of the guys that is absent, gets an answer: “There is no such person here”, and they are trying to snatch their incoming business.

All the little things that normally would be where they should, are never there anymore.

Paper clips and staplers are in the strangest place of them all, like the back room, next to the bathroom where no one really uses for nothing else but storage. Makes you wonder what those guys need them for in privacy of the dark room? Hmmm?

We are out of drinking water after only two days, and they do not bother replacing the cooler.

Maybe I should do it, huh, boys? After my dead body!

On occasion, they don’t lock the door to the store, because they thought that “ that other guy, whatshisname was still there somewhere’. ( Back room?)

Great, if they only stole your computers I wouldn’t have anything against it.

And final thing that makes me want to scream is the toilet. Not once the lid is closed.

If lid was even opened, I would not complain, but the seat is always up, and what’s with the men not being able to aim? Practice, practice, practice! and I mean practice.

If you don’t know how to do it, go home and learn!

Do I really need to step in the puddle of urine every time I want to use a bathroom? Do I need to look at your spit in the sink ( Oh, and that better be only a spit, and nothing else!) Eeeewwww!

And suddenly the bathroom has become a frikkin' library, too.

A magazine that surely doesn't belong to me, has found it's way there and ended up being hidden on the side of the toilet by the wall.

Do we not have the time to read at home, the car or at your desk ? Must you really do it here? Lerning how to golf while sitting on the toilet is some new hobby one of them picked up, and now the toilet plunger has been replaced with a toy golf club, and neatly stacked next to the toilet. I have not seen any balls. Propably a good thing, too.

You would have thought that wearing a suit and having their shoes shined, men would have some manners. I guess, men are men, regardless of what they wear.

...and some just can't wait....

2009-02-13T10:55:00.001-06:00

I’m all in for riding motorcycles. I can’t wait for the season to start, so I can spend most of the beautiful, sunny days on the giant, shining, vibrating machine. As much as I love to ride, there are some limits as to when I would do it and enjoy it. So far we only had two 60 degrees days, and even with the temperatures this high ( yes, it’s a heat wave) the ground is still frozen. The salt and all other residual of winter is still here. Seldom patches of ice are still visible on some roads, and the penetrating air is pretty darn cold.

I understand the sudden urge to get out and ride once the weather improved, but really, is it all worth it?

Most people start paying less attention on the road once exposed to such dramatic change in weather. Suddenly the extra beam of sun light, those few more degrees of warmth make people drive as they were totally new drivers. The sun can be blinding while reflecting off of the edges of unmelted still snow. The drivers who have sudden urge to blast music in their vehicles and drive with open windows can be pretty distracted with all this excitement. Let’s not forget that they are not prepared to see motorcyclists out on the road just yet.

It can be warm driving a car, but being on the bike is a totally different experience.

Since the temperatures rose to thirty-something, I have seen at least fifteen motorcycles out.

This morning I saw a guy almost crashing because on his turn, his rear tire caught a thin sheet of melting in the sun ice. Of course today the highest temperatures predicted are in mid thirties. Not such a great riding weather is you ask me.

Are they really that stupid to think it is safe to ride right now, or are they simply under educated about the safety of the roads and weather conditions? If you ask me, I don’t think it is all that cool to be seen on the bike half frozen and shivering.

It makes me sad to later learn that someone got killed on a motorcycle because of their own stupidity. I don’t mind getting caught in the rain, or riding on a cold day, but a cold day during summer is still a whole lot more pleasurable than nearly zero temperatures in the winter. I guess if they are enjoying it, and I really hope they do, they should at least take all necessary precautions and avoid small and rural roads. Just because the sun melts the snow, doesn’t mean the roads are safe. The ground is frozen up to 2 feet below, and tires don’t have the grip on the asphalt. Having only two and much thinner than the car tires, places the rider in a less controllable position on the road. Let’s be safe. After all, season is just around the corner!

WHEN KIDS LEAVE THE NEST

2009-01-24T22:27:00.002-06:00

When my girls were younger, much younger, I tried to imagine how would I accept them growing up. When they grew up, I forgot about very important fact. I blocked it out I guess, not allowing any further thoughts inside my brain. The girls leaving home.

When the oldest one went to college, I felt good. I knew that at least she was on her way to adult life. making something of herself.

The younger one graduated High School, and I started worrying a little.

While the oldest decided to move out on her own, in her case with friends, I panicked. Not so much though, as the younger girl announcing that she wants to move as well. Now my feelings are all scattered and I'm frantic. I love them both, but they want to be so independent. Something was subconsciously hoping for, but I didn't realize it would come this soon. Advising them against taking up responsibility wouldn't be the right thing to do. After all, I can't keep them hostage at home, and expect to have a peaceful life. On the other hand, they are still very young and I feel like I failed somewhere down the line.

Then I look at my own past, and I realize, that if I could manage being on my own since the age of 16, them being twenty one, and nineteen is not so young after all.

Times were different back in the 80's, but I was a newbie here on this gigantic land of US, and yet I made it. I keep telling myself, that if not now, later might be too late.

I certainly wouldn't want them living with me till they're thirty, but parting with daily interactions, and being cut out of their world for the most part hurts.

I still have the little one to look after, and it will be another fifteen years before she gets the idea of moving. Not sooner. I hope.

What's love got to do with it?

2009-01-12T20:05:00.002-06:00

That has been my controversy between me, myself, and I for a long time, and I assure you, it has nothing to do with a movie or a song.

Love for another human being is different from a love for an animal. However you look at it, an animal depends on us for food, and shelter. Humans are pretty much self efficient.

Applying this situation to a dog, the dog will love us unconditionally even if we forget to feed it on time or we skip his favorite walk more than once. He will love us and he only has so much to offer.

Love that a human being has to offer is much greater. There is so many factors involved, but still comes down to the same issue. Love- the unconditional, loyal, and honest relationship. Dogs are honest, they have no choice, but humans? Not so much.

The dilemma I stumbled upon and has been boggling my mind for the last eight years is something I am yet hoping to get a good explanation for. I have not been able to comprehend, nor deal with this particular issue and perhaps there is someone who can shed some light on the subject for me.

The story about a bitch, a pup and a woman from hell

Or simply three bitches that need to get their act together.

Woman from hell is the dog owner who despite many complaints and suggestions of the concerned and caring, refuses to do the right thing.

The bitch is the senior dog, suffering from stroke symptoms and developing arthritis, a mother to the female baby-bitch.

Baby- bitch, an eight year old Pitt Bull mix who inherited all her father’s traits and aggressive attitude is too much to handle, and needs some serious training.

The woman in question and her bitches live together in a tiny place with limited daylight and no back yard. The woman claims to love her dogs and cannot imagine herself without them, and in all those years she wouldn’t give up an hour of her sleep to walk the dogs. No children or other responsibilities burden her shoulders, and yet, she cannot manage her time. Not because she can’t but because she refuses. I call it lazy. She calls it love.

Red flag – It’s all I need and want that matters.

Woman in question is only doing what is best for her, and since I don’t want to elaborate on many of her other issues, I will only stick to her and the dogs at this time, but there is a lot more to the story.

Mother dog, the senior who suffered a stroke nobody seems to know when, is acting strange as she ages, her behavior is very questionable. She can stand and stare on empty wall for hours without moving and then suddenly snaps and starts barking. No, she does not see ghosts or any of the spiritual orbs, she is just realizing that she has been looking at her own shadow.

Sometimes she just stands there over the dish of water and suddenly falls right into it.

I seriously think she wants a bath, but her owner says shes being "silly". That's a first. I have never heard of a dog being silly.

The other bitch, her offspring, is full of energy and always picks fights with her mother. Typical mother-daughter household you might think, but we are talking here about dogs, that have only 15x20 room to live in, and not a square foot more! Well, with an exception of a half a bath where you can barely turn around and a furnace room, a.k.a. a yard for the dogs to go potty.

Imagine when the furnace is actually turned on and starts blowing that feces scented air in and blowing it back out. For some this just may be a new air freshener patent opportunity.

The only window in the place never opens. Light filtering blinds do not allow the sun rays to penetrate inside, but at least some light is being shed into the room.

Outdoors do not exist and if the stroke victim can in fact remember being outside, it would be the first day she was born. Before the woman took her with a promise of wonderful, loving life.

I would be lying if I said the dogs never been outside. They have been on couple occasions. One, when the woman was moving and actually had to take them outside to the car, and two, when they accidentally escaped when someone left the door unlocked.

They ran out as if the house was on fire, trying to absorb all the things they were missing out on. Unfortunately, some other person walking their dog was in their path, and they decided to eliminate the obstacle. The little miniature poodle died later that day after unsuccessful surgery and all the attempts to save little guys life. The owner was kind enough not to bring up a lawsuit, but the woman-bitch had to pay the vet and move out of the complex.

She in fact did move, but to much smaller place, so the bitches only got a glimpse of the outdoors and didn’t even get to smell the freshly cut grass.

Despite multiple pleas and suggestions from many, that she should put the dogs up for adoption with someone who can at least give them luxury of the outdoors, she refused claiming, she loves them and that they don’t need to be outside at all.

At this point, I would be afraid to take them out myself, I thought. The only time they have been to the vet was when they were puppies, and without shots and not being immune to anything other than the diluted bleach to clean floors with, they could get sick from just sniffing the ground.

The bitches fight a lot. The woman- bitch more often than not, has important things to do and doesn’t feed the dogs regularly. There may be days they don’t get fed until almost midnight next day, or night at this point. Wondering why they act the way they do and fight over one spilled kibble? I don’t. They fight for the bathroom spot on the floor and for survival.

The stroke victim, senior dog is surprisingly strong and I am amazed she still lives.

I cannot imagine being locked up in a small room with no afresh air and not to mention air conditioning when temperatures reached 90+ degrees. If it bothers her, she sure has no one to complain to. All she can do is have another stroke, and I am certain she already had more than one.

So summing up this “love” story, and allowing myself to vent a little, I am still angry, frustrated and confused as to what love really means to this woman.

I have to admit, I am glad she doesn’t have children, but she claims the dogs are like children to her, why not show them a little love?

Irreverent Fashion Police

2009-01-10T12:20:00.003-06:00

Fashion over common sense. I have been entertaining myself by observing some of those people who not only know how to dress,

don't dress appropriately for the weather or event, or just are plain clueless.From outfits to hair

and even accessories.I made a habit of carrying my camera with me, and wonder if one day someone will chase me down

the street for taking a picture of their butt crack.

Flip flops in the snow are not anti-slip prevention, and high heels with your boyfriends stained, greasy, and ripped carpenter's pants and a sports bra are not going to win you a best dresser trophy.

Sometimes I wonder if they even look in the mirror? There are days I don't feel like dressing up myself,

but would I dare wearing my pajamas to the grocery store? Probably not.

The girls in mini skirts and ugly furry boots, I can't even remember what they call them lately,

skin tight T-shirt and no coat doesn't look all the HOTT even to hormone raging teenage boy when

the temperatures are in single digits. Why not just wear what's nice, clean and comfortable. Most important, something that is appropriate for the weather?

I guess i will never understand the minds of the teenagers, but when it comes to a grown up who claims to be a professional, now, that's totally different story.

The reputation of someone I know ( yeah, I know...how unfortunate) is not all that great when it comes to state of mind, but the fashion statement she makes is a true tabloid material.

I often see some people stuck in the 80's still thinking they are in the rock band. Mohawks are back, but not suitable for a young entrepreneur, and the mullet cut looking suite on the dog, but not on a forty year old woman who is looking for a "better" job in a marketing firm.

Really, do they even think how hideous this looks?

Yesterday I attended a district meeting where some new members of our company, still in training were being put on the spot.

The cool looking guy with spiky hair set on glue gel was not going to make it. White, worn out gym shoes don't go well with black suit either,

but considering the weather etc, he had a pass there. But the hair.... brought everyone attention and distracted many from observing what they came there for-the new strategy plan.

No matter what, we will see them everywhere at all times of the year.

Right now, just to make you guys feel better, I am sitting behind a very large man, who is bent over under one of my desks in the room performing some computer set up.

I will need at least six weeks of mental therapy after starring at his crack all day.

Story with out the end...

2009-01-08T09:15:00.001-06:00

Dating is difficult as it is. But when you are a single, full time parent to multiple children, when you are a full time employee and have very little free time to yourself it is next to impossible.

Dating is being put on the back burner and makes things almost impossible to happen unless you are willing to sacrifice your free time. To me, my free time is very precious. I love “my time” and I use it wisely. I do things that I normally wouldn’t have time or opportunity to do. Dating has been a drag for some reason, but on occasion, I get myself together and actually spend some time searching internet for that special someone.

I guess the feeling of being desired and have someone interested in you is important to our self esteem.

At least that’s what many people say. I listen. I don’t necessarily follow through, but I take notes and try.

Being hurt in the past and not doing all that well in trust department, we tend to either be too reserved or open up too soon and watch the disaster happen. We think we are ready to share our precious time with that special someone, but quickly we realize that that someone is not all that special after all.

So we retrieve and start all over again, but in many cases we build our walls higher and thicker.

Now, we realize that we have less and less of that free time that we already invested in getting dressed, pretty up and get out there and now we have to repeat the time consuming repertoire.

We talk to a few people, start making notes and comparing. The next decision will be made more carefully. Who do we decide to pursue? The good looking, cocky guy who claims to make all your dreams come true? He claims to have a great job and likes to travel a lot?

Or the average Joe who says right up front that he cannot afford to take you out, but that he is loyal, loving and a very good cook. He also needs to find a place to move in quick, so of course he will be super nice to you as he sees great opportunity here.

Or perhaps the great looking guy in a suit who describes himself as a little shy, has several pictures with pets and sports cars and apparently has masters degree in something, but neither you or him can really describe what. His every other word is misspelled, and none of the letters capitalized. Laziness, lack of respect for a written art, or simple ignorance? Or this is the guy who flunked high school and opened up his own garage, and is a master to his multiple dogs? Master. To some degree. Holding none.

Misleading information and portraying themselves as someone they are not. People do that every day.

Who to trust?

Finally, someone surfaced that just may be worth a try. Spelling is decent, and readable, he lives within reasonable distance and has his own car. he emphesizes on his education and a successful business. What's not to like?

He hasn’t asked you if you live alone yet, but he does keep asking what’s for dinner? Odd. Nobody is perfect, and we need to be able to trust someone and let our guard down once in a while.

You exchange a few emails and try not to notice sudden change in his spelling. Apparently his friends are not available to write for him anymore.

You have some interests in common, and even work in the same field.

During the email exchange, he gets your full name, and vice versa.

Being a somewhat of a public figure, your name lingers on multiple web sites and the business you work for is easily tracked. Three or four emails later, some quick chit-chat via messenger and several hours later you are receiving your first phone call on your business line.

Being busy that you are, you postpone the conversation and promise to call back as soon as you can. Meanwhile you are wondering how did he figure out your phone number so quickly?

Smart guy? He likes you so much he couldn’t wait? It can be good or bad experience. At this point, you still don’t know for sure, but willing to give it a try. After all, if you don’t, you will never know, right?

No more than an hour later, another phone calls interrupts your quiet moment and here he is again.

He is anxious to speak with you and find out more about you. During the conversation, you realize that his choice of words isn’t half as bad as his typing and spelling and excuse his partial illiteracy quickly.

You invested your entire lunch hour to the conversation with this man and finally was able to get away under pretense of having a lot of work waiting.

Almost instantly after hanging up you receive an email thanking you for a great conversation and inviting you to do this again and more often. After you just rolled your eyes, you also get an instant message demanding your attention. You quickly reply “ I’m busy now” and change your stealth settings.

Within the next hour or so, you receive another email, this time talking about how you are going to spend your next weekend and suggesting you make time for it, as it suppose to be so great.

One more attempt on messenger and since he didn’t get your reply, he redials your number.

Now, a little irritated with the guys persistence, you let it go to the voice mail, and listen later.

After learning that he was a little upset that you didn’t answer the phone, he decided to write you yet another email, which of course came within minutes after the voice mail.

Being on guard now, and seeing what’s happening, you definitely loose all interest, no matter how exciting, loving and caring he claims to be. Email explains that he is very much interested and he thinks he is in love. He wants to know if he did something wrong to upset you, and apologizes up front.

He begs you to call him at your earliest convenience, and talk to him, but you already deleted his number off your caller ID and email.

On your way home, you receive three more calls, but since your phone is buried in your purse, you will not rush to get it out. With amazement, you read the number missed later that night and see that you have not one, but three voice messages, all from the same guy.

Each one cries about you not being interested in him anymore and bowing him off so quickly without giving him a chance. You pause, let out a huge sigh and call your friend attorney for advice.

Next morning you have two voice messages awaiting on your business answering machine and as you log into the emails, three of the top ones are from no one else but Mr. Unsecure Stalker himself.

Thank goodness for spam bucket, where you quickly direct the emails and erase the voice messages off your machine without listening to them all the way through.

After attending half day meeting your day is only getting better and better. You only think your guy finally got the hint. A delivery person enters your office carrying a vase with fresh flowers.

The little attached note says’ I wanted to apologize for whatever you think I said wrong. Please don’t be mad. Love, M.

Before the delivery guy leaves he slips a receipt into your hand and explains that the online purchase for express delivery was placed on COD in case no one was there to pick up, they would only charge for the trip, but not flowers, as they were ordered to go back. Nice! And the flower shop is only located several floors below your high rise office.

Rolling eyes has become more of a habit now, and a much as you are trying to avoid it, delivery guy notices it and grins.

He takes the thirty bucks you just gave him and leaves you with a flower bouquet that you actually like. Well, look at it this way. You just bought yourself some flowers.

The sound that came out of your computer indicating new message has sent a chill down your spine.

He wanted to know if you liked the flowers and he was apologizing again for not paying.

Using the lamest excuse he literally invited himself to your apartment for dinner, suggesting he would bring the wine. What’s for dinner?” was typed in bold letters and just about tipped your scale.

As a reply you sent him a definition of a "stalker" and asked politely not to contact you again.

Hoping this worked, you gladly looked into the next day schedule and called your girlfriend to confirm girls night out. No more emails that night. No messages only a peaceful, quiet time.

Next day went by faster than you thought it would, and without unwanted interruption you almost forgot about Mr. M.

He didn’t make appearance in any shape or form all day and you finally started to relax.

Looking at your missed call on your cell phone you quickly dialed in for the voice mail.

Your girlfriend wanted to make sure you remembered the meeting that night.

Later, all showered and changed, relaxed and ready to have a good time, you hurried up to your favorite Italian restaurant a few miles from your place.

Valet parking always comes in handy on rainy and windy days and you take advantage of it.

You leave your keys with some grim looking guy and hurry inside, where preordered appetizer is waiting.

Having a wonderful evening and catching up on all the girl stuff, you leave taking some left overs home with you.

As you enter the apartment, sweet aroma of honey tea and unknown pastries escapes the room and at that moment you wish you had a gun in your hand.

Not sure whether to enter or leave running, you pause at the door asking who was inside.

Shadow of a man emerged out of the kitchen and you quickly recognized Mr. M. wearing an apron.

“You didn’t answer my calls today. I was worried so I came by” he said and slowly started approaching toward you. Your knees almost gave in and you grabbed the wall for support.

Your words were lodged in your throat, you were gasping for air and millions of thoughts were crowding your mind right now. …

“But…how did you get in? “the only question you wanted the answer to was barely audible.

“Oh, I told the neighbor I was your brother and was going to surprise you. I hope you don’t mind.”

Great! That slime actually pulled it off. How, you have no idea, but he got lucky, as the seventy five year old lady next door always guards her door and sees who is coming and going. She is always looking for a conversation with everyone, and obviously she knew you were expecting your brothers visit for holidays.

Bastard. What now? How to get rid of him?

The phone call saved the moment and you picked up the receiver. It was your friend announcing you left your notebook behind. Perfect excuse to leave, and call for help.

Oh, You’re leaving? Mr. M doesn’t look too happy and you can see his eyes narrow.

‘Yes, I’ll be right back. I forgot something.” At this moment you are trying to keep it cool as you know this is not a good time to piss off a man who has instant access to the set of butcher knives right behind him.

“Oh, but you don’t have to go. This can wait. I can’t.” he says and slowly moves forward as you are backing out of the kitchen. You are weak at the knees and cold sweat covers the palms of your hands.

As you back into the wall, you notice a shiny object in his hand……

WEDNESDAY RANT ON COMMON SENSE

2009-01-07T15:32:00.004-06:00

Going green and trying to save the environment is on everyone’s minds lately.

This seems to be the first thing right after saving the company unnecessary expenses, making cuts where possible and eliminate the waste. Waste that costs big companies big money and even with the small businesses is adding up to a big chunk.

And of course due to cutting budgets, here comes the pink slip.

Having said that, I get seriously frustrated and annoyed to see so much unnecessary waste of paper and human labor.

On daily basis we receive multiple junk mailings, stuffers and advertising that ends up in our garbage. Companies thrive on exposing their name to as many and as often as they can. That’s how they make money. I can understand that.

What boggles my mind and makes me scream is that I just attended a company meeting and one of the main issues was the waste. All the mail that goes out and confuses people.

All those unopened envelopes and stuffers being delivered multiple times to homeowners just to say the same thing over and over. Not advertising, not promotion, just information we already have.

We were discussing the possibility of eliminating the extra mailings to clients and only concentrate on the ones that have some value to the recipient.

Let’s not waste the money and paper. But each time we correct even one letter in address and make it an Avenue instead of Ave., the mailings go out, and not on one simple sheet of paper stating the change, but the entire multipage document is being printed.

Easier said that done apparently. No one is doing anything about cutting the costs.

Just the other day I received a thick envelope with all the colorful brochures I get every month, and know them by heart. They are stuffed into the envelope and one page letter informing me that I overpaid on my last payment, and that I should be expecting a refund.

Hey! I got $$$ coming! That’s good, right?

The second envelope with the post mark of the same day came also filled with the same informational stuffing and….. my refund check!

That was quick, I thought. But then I looked: The check was for six cents!

Not dollars. Cents!

It cost them forty some cents to mail it plus the labor to stuff it, and they did it twice!

Where is the logic?

Christmas decorations

2009-01-04T18:07:00.005-06:00

When I was a little girl decorating for Christmas was something I couldn't wait to do.

Of course the fun part was hanging ornaments, but I never had to clean up all the boxes and wrappers and put them away.

My grandparents used to do that.

In my adult life, in the beginning I loved the whole tradition and complied accordingly, but lately I don't feel very upbeat about putting up the lights, especially outside.

I don't climb the latters and roofs to put up a Santa or a Reindeer or hook up the string of lights that I am going to have to take down again soon. The shrubs have not seen any decorations in the last two year either.

Am I lazy or I just don't feel it anymore? I think it is a combination of both.

in my old neighborhood I felt I had to only to keep up with the rest of the peole on the block.

Since I have moved, I dont see that many families dressing up their homes. What a shame. I kind of liked that challenge.

I still put up the Christmas tree and lights throughout the house. I like the dimmed and cozy atmosphere it creates, but taking them off is something I drag.

All the work, the mess and effort I put into it has to be repeated, but now only to take everything down and put away for another year.

I remember we used to decorate the weekend before, or on the Christmas Eve and leave everything until Three Kings in February. It was a tradition we all liked to keep and were able to enjoy the lights a little longer.

Here, we take then down right after Christmas or New Years weekend at the latest. We look at pepole who display their decorations in mid january as some kind of weirdos.

Stores are already filled up with Saint Patrick's and Easter decorations advertising early sale.

What is wrong with people? Do we really need to make things run so fast? I am still under Christmas spirit and want to be able to feel it for as long as I can. I don't want to be told I have to look forward to Easter three months away. Our lives are running way faster than they should. Work takes up most of our time and we dont have enough of it to spend with our loved ones.

Life is so hard to enjoy being on the run all the time, not having time to spend with the family, and I mean quality time. That brings on a whole new topic about raising children, morals and values, and I will not elaborate on those just yet.

My weekend is coming to an end and I don't know where it went. By the time I know, it will be Saturday all over again.

Will power and temptation

2008-12-27T19:02:00.004-06:00

Food and diet.

Over the holidays we tend to eat a little more than normal. OK, so we eat a lot more.

Regardless of the season however, Woman's Magazine perfectly displayed by every register at almost every grocery shop has perfect solutions for loosing weight.

The front page always showing that accomplished loser holding up a piece of clothing that seems to be enough to make an army tent and the minute you start flipping the pages, you find all those delicious recipes for cakes, dinners, etc.

What a woman to do? Looking at the front page wants me to stop eating, give it all up and become that woman on the front page. Sometimes I wonder if I would even survive on the handful of fruit and a slice of meat all day. I'm sure the transition would be difficult, but I keep trying.

The I flip another page and here it is. Beautiful centerfold of perfectly prepared meals and most under 30 minutes! Now, that's tempting. How could one resist?

I cut out the little squares with directions and put them away for my weekend dinner preparation. Back to the front page to look up the "ways" of weight loss and curious about the before and after pictures. Sometimes it seems like the woman lost the weight over at least twenty years, so it really wasn't a quick fix. The pictures from before are definitely reflecting a lot of hair spray and spandex pants. This definitely makes me think, did she really loose that weight on the little diet she presented, and over what period of time.

Then my phone rings and my daughter asks whats for dinner.

I immediately flip to the middle section of the monthly and pick what looks most appetizing.

Now, lets not check the calorie count, or it will definitely throw my front page diet off.

Off to a new start, again.

2008-12-17T11:23:00.000-06:00

I am making my list each year and then forget about it until Christmas time when I sit down and realize that this year just flew by so fast I haven’t even got half the stuff accomplished if any!

I am a procrastinator.

I need to work on this habit because I really have a lot to do in my short life. I have big plans, but who doesn’t?

My last year’s resolution was loosing weight. I did some, but then I gained it all back. Why? I do that when I’m stressed. Economy, my kids and personal life contributed to it all. I gave in and now I’m scrambling back out. I have to say I improved my stamina and my my walking started slowly transforming into jogging but that's not nearly what I had in mind. I guess any is better then none, right?

My business expansion didn't exactly went as planned. A couple of obstacles on the road and procrastination with a combination of great summer weather made me put my plans on hold in case I would “overwork” myself and not have any fun. Once again, life is short, and I intend to enjoy it whenever I can.

I have no regrets. We work hard for the most of our lives, and end up in the same spot. The difference is, the quality of life we live, and since I can’t really complain about the quality of my life, I feel I still have plenty of time for improvement if I chose to.

Travel is always on the top of my list every year. This past March I was able to escape for a short road trip to Vegas and Arizona and several one day getaways on the weekends really made a difference.

Next January is New York trip to visit my old school friends I haven’t talk to in nearly thirty years. We are all excited to meet in person and talk about all the silly stuff we did as kids through eight years of elementary school back in out old country. Something to put on my list and look forward to.

February is Florida time. Another long weekend trip, but even three days is better than nothing at all. It is so hard to leave it all and enjoy when under constant stress. I think I can manage three days.

Finishing my book, finally. Maybe. definitely!

I have gotten really distracted lately with everything that has been going on in my life that I neglected what used to be my number one goal last year. And the year before that. And practically my dream since I was a little girl.

Distraction, and the fact that I had it all almost finished and lost it all was a big disappointment for me. How could I allowed myself to be so careless and actually trust my brand new lap top?

It crashed before I even though of being smart and backing up my work, but who would have thought machines are so unreliable? Ha!

Taking baby steps to recreate my masterpiece time keeps passing and I am in a limbo.

Changes and different moods made me realize that I need to hurry up because I have more ideas and less time. I think all this has contributed to my ADD and Dyslexia and I suddenly realized that I am even typing backwards. Someone suggested that I take a break and go on over due vacation. Apparently I am burned out.

So going back to my list of things, there isn't a whole lot other than live better, happier life.

Less stress if possible and travel more.

Travelling and enjoying living is taking its priority in my life. I have seen too much death in last couple of years and makes me realize that we only have one life, and a short one. Much healthier lifestyle definitely needs to be applied, but overall I need less stress. When I stress I am unproductive.

So knowing my procrastination and bad time management issues, I am going to make yet another list of things to accomplish and probably stash it in a notebook somewhere where I wont find it until next year. Or maybe I should print it and hang it over my bed so I can look at it every day and night and remind myself of the things I want to do. It may actually work this time. Nah.

Expect the unexpected...

2008-05-10T17:13:00.002-05:00

As she drove herself to emergency room of the nearest hospital, many thoughts crossed her mind. Lots of little messages flashed in her head and many disillusions were scrambling through, but the main thought was, what if they find a reason to keep her in that night.

Nothing else mattered but as long as she was able to go back home, and soon, she would be okay.

What if they want to do some extensive testing and won’t release her from the hospital the same night? She wasn’t prepared for this. She needed to be at work early next morning, and she was seriously hoping that this was going to take no more than a couple of hours. She should be out of there by 9 pm. And she was convinced she would be.

Two hours she was able to spare, but not a minute longer.

Think positive. Think positive. She kept repeating to herself. This can’t be that bad.

And the fact was, it probably wasn’t.

She didn’t know what to expect but deep inside, she knew it was nothing to worry about.

How could be? After all she was still young and in good health overall. She never had any problems that were more serious than the seasonal allergies, and her family didn’t have any known diseases either.

She just wanted to check it out. Just in case. Just to be at peace with herself. In an hour or two she would be out of there and on her way home with some pills prescribed by the doctor. Nothing to worry about. It’s all good.

As she slowly rolled her black BMW to the back of the building where the Emergency sign was flickering in big, red letters, she felt relieved to see that there weren’t too many cars parked in the lot.

Hopefully this won’t take long, she thought as she pulled the car into the parking slot closest to the main entrance. It was cold outside, and it was a late evening. Who knows how much colder it was going to get over the next hour or so, and besides, who like walking in the middle of the night in a parking lot that doesn’t have much light?

She was always taking extra safety precautions. She watched too many movies and read too many books, and was always trying to be prepared. Just in case. Her imagination never let her rest. She was mentally prepared for the worst.

The waiting area was pleasantly empty, and only one family sitting to the back of the room. From looking at them, she figured that they were already taken care of, and perhaps awaiting just a follow up or some paperwork formalities. “ Good’ she thought. No waiting. This will be quick. Thank God. She approached the front desk and didn’t bother to force a smile on the sign of big, shining white set of teeth that emerged out of the clerk’s mouth.

“Can I help you?” Young man behind the reception desk asked her as she approached.

“I really hope you can.” She let out a sigh and began. “I need to have my head examined” She said with a straight face and suddenly realized how it must have sounded to him. She instantly plastered a grin on her face.

Tony, as the tag on his front pocket of a green, short sleeved scrub displayed measured her up and down. He looked at her with uncertain expression not knowing weather to smile. His shirt was exposing his multiple tattoos on both fore arms. He had a stud in a nose and multiple ear piercings. I wonder how those will look on him when he’s sixty, she quickly ran a visual on him.

“What’s wrong with your head again?” Tony asked with an intension of making her explain a little more about the reason for being in ER.

What else could she say without getting into long details with someone who wasn’t even going to help her. Not this guy. He was here to take information and sign her in. She was too familiar with hospital procedures and sometimes it bothered her, that paperwork was taking first place before actual emergency help.

Without proper documentation, insurance and endless forms you couldn’t get a glass of water not to mention pass the front desk to get any information. You had to wait until first available staff member on duty came out to measure your temperature and blood pressure, which most likely has risen since you got to the ER and have been waiting for hours.

“Can you be more specific?” tattoo boy asked as he punched some words and codes on his computer keyboard. After letting a big sigh she proceeded to explain the symptoms.

“I have a really bad headache. I am dizzy and I haven’t slept in four days. I’m exhausted and irritated, and no, I’m not PMSing, so don’t even start.. I have a weird sensation in my head, and it isn’t just a normal migraine. My eye has a twitch, I can’t concentrate. I’m loosing my balance and I feel that if I don’t get any help tonight, I will loose IT!

I need to get my head examined to find out what is wrong with me” she gasped for another breath and before she could continue, Tony jumped in. “Okay, easy, please” he said and roller his eyes and ended his expression with a frown. The registrar seemed to be a bit overwhelmed with all that she just rolled out on him.

He only had so many character spaces to type the symptoms in, and she had a long description. It wasn’t a broken arm, or leg. That was a lot of typing he had to do and needed to abbreviate it to minimum. His lips were shut tight forming a little straight line as he crammed the words into the little spaces on his computer form.

“So, your eye hurts and you have a headache?” he asked. He was trying not to think about how this whole thing sounded in a first place. If it wasn’t a hospital, and he didn’t have to be professional about it, he would suggest that the woman sees a shrink, but instead, he kept his mouth shut.

‘No. There is more, and my eye doesn’t hurt. It twitches.’ She tried to correct him, but quickly realized it wasn’t going to work. She let a big sigh and left it alone. She only nodded. God only knows what else is he going to write on her chart.

Green scrub printed something out of his computer and shoved a few pages in front of her to sign. He didn’t look up, just kept typing away. His lips shut tight and eyes squinted.

‘ Sign both pages for me’ he said pointing the signature lines with his eyes still fixated on the computer screen.

If he only smiled a little, he wouldn’t be so bad- she thought. He was probably in his early twenties, with dark blonde hair and blue eyes. He had a slight tan and was kind of cute looking, she noticed. Too bad for those tattoos and piercings. When he stood up, she noticed he was well build and most likely spent all his free time at the gym.

“ You can wait in the lobby. The nurse will call you shortly” Tony said pointing to the waiting area and disappeared behind his desk again.

She walked over to the row of blue and green chairs in the lobby and sat down.

The area started to fill up with more patients, and before she realized it, there were only a few chairs that have not been occupied yet.

.......….to be continued

2008-03-10T12:03:00.000-05:00

What better way to start your vacation than having your plane delayed an hour and a half!

Keeping positive thoughts and remaining in good spirits we waited patiently and only exchanged some glances that said it all. Not only did we get to the airport earlier-just in case- but ended up waiting what seemed forever.

Finally, able to situate ourselves on the plane we relaxed and awaited our first destination; Las Vegas!

The flight was ordinary and no parts left behind or fallen off the aircraft were reported. Lavatories had lights working, and nobody fell asleep and drooled on my shoulder.The crew could definitely use more sense of humor, but overall it wasn’t bad.

Some hour and a half after our arrival, we were finally able to drive out of the parking lot in our Dodge Magnum and into the big city lights. Las Vegas looks very glamorous at night, but for those who have seen it during the day, it is just a plain ole’ city.

We parked our luggage in the pre-booked hotel of which name I can’t remember and probably for a good reason, unpacked our lap tops to find out that the WiiFi we were promised was non existent or it was just not working at the moment.

" Do you think we should take our lap tops with?’ I asked being a little concerned about safety. " Nah. I travel all the time and had nothing ever like that happen. Not to worry."

We left locking the room behind and checking the door for last time.

We left to explore the city around 7 pm. After walking miles on the Las Vegas Boulevard, admiring the fountain show, lights and the weirdest people you will ever see, after a few alcoholic drinks and some unknown food, we made our way back to the hotel with hopes to rest for next morning expenditure.

Arriving smoothly in the elevator at the sixth floor, we opened the door few minutes short of 2 am, and my friend walked right into the room and into his bed. I froze at the entrance starring at my bed, and placing my hand over my mouth not knowing weather to laugh or scream.

The suitcase I left on top was gone. My lap top still in sight, but the bag of previously unopened crackers was laying on the nightstand half empty. A tall can of Budweiser on the dresser, and opened toiled indicated to me that someone has been here.

The bed seemed to have a big bulge in the middle, and I quickly notices the outline of a body.

Not knowing how to react, the dummy that I am I forgot to take my camera out and take a picture for evidence. Instead I pointed in the direction of the bed covers and quietly asked my friend what was THAT???

Both out minds were raising with similar thoughts. A dead body? An intruder? What the....

After slightly poking at the foot, the covers slowly moved and a sleepy face of a man in his underwear emerged to the surface. Looking around totally disoriented, he asked what we were doing in his room. "Dude! You are in our room." we said and that was about the end of our serious look. As soon as we realized that the guy was harmless, and got there thinking this was his room, I could not control my laughter.

At the same time anger and worries also floated to surface as the thought of someone else electronic key opening your door was a serious security problem. Nothing was missing and only moved to the side, and the poor guy seemed genuinely confused and nothing else. He left hugging his clothes tightly against his body and mumbled something in apologetic manner.

His behind belonged a few rooms across the floor. After a slight struggle over the phone to get the right party to attend to our incident, and security taking us to a new assigned room on a different floor, we were finally able to rest and of course not without a constant giggle. Before unpacking again, we checked the closet, bathroom and under beds to make sure nothing else was going to surprise us that night.

Morning brought us a nice sunshine and after gathering all our belongings and regretting not having at least one picture from the night before, we said good bye to Las Vegas and headed toward Grand Canyon, Arizona.

We spent most of our day in the Canyon and from slight rain, to snow and freezing, strong winds, the weather finally changed and we were able to glance at the canyon during sun shine, which makes such a big difference. Several dozens of pictures later, we decided that either we need to spend at least two days here admiring the beauty of nature, or rocks are rocks and we have seen enough for the day. Rocks were rocks, but all in their own and different appearance. Cameras needed to be charged, so the answer was clear.

From there we took off to Flagstaff, explored town for a while, and found a hotel, where once again, we are suppose to have WiFi. Interestingly enough, it would only work in the check in office and upon going into our room, it would disconnect. After about twenty some tries, moving the computer into various positions and finding no solution, I gave up on trying.

" So, do you think we should watch TV, charge the cell phone or plug in the computer?" Looking around we only found one double outlet to which solution was obtaining an extension cord, and make full use of it. I still haven’t checked if we got charged for that extra!

In the morning drove to Winslow, AZ to see the Meteor Crater. What we thought would be a quick stop, ended up being a nice and interesting expenditure and few hours later we were on our way to Sedona, AZ. now this is an awesome town. Mostly all tourism, great weather and I was happy to see the temperatures increase from 48 at the Canyon to 57 in Sedona.

We walked the town, we explored the little places, and many little shops, we ate and we were ready to go to our last destination, Phoenix.

Arriving in the city rather late in the evening, making some calls and booking another hotel online, without being online, we finally got a decent rate. Promised WiFi was finally working!

The next day we explored the city, drove to see the Cubs practice in Mesa, attempted to climb Camelback Mountain, visited Cooperstown pub, drank awesome margarita for breakfast at Salty’s in Scottsdale, walking miles and miles and admiring little shops of Old Town Scottsdale we were ready to come back....or were we?

The trip back was without any serious trouble, but the whole time there, we were laughing and laughing some more. The only flight attendant smiling was a guy who hopefully wasn’t gay, and had some good comebacks for the attack of smart ass passengers. I had my own giggle after accidentally attempting to trip one of the servers with hopes she might at least grin a little, but instead her mouth was sealed tight forming a thin line. She looked like she needed a job change or vacation, or both and then some!

Luggage retrieval took us somewhere about an hour, and we wondered what to they do to those bags behind the scenes. Finally we were back and out in the cold.

Hello pot holes!

Now, I am so tired, I feel like I need a vacation from my vacation.